Beam’s Eight Star Review

Beam’s Eight Star Review

Beam’s Eight Star is not available in California, it’s something I picked up for a few bucks while out traveling through bourbon country and thought would be fun to review. Yes I knew it was going to be terrible before I even handle the guy a $5 and got $2 back, but that didn’t dissuade me one bit. To know the good you have to understand the bad. It gives you perspective on what truly is a “Drain Pour” and what’s just on the low-end of mediocre.

In Jim Beam’s Words: Beam’s Eight Star

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I don’t know about you, but when a brand doesn’t even claim their own product it leaves me with very little confidence in it. Like I said above I wasn’t exactly overflowing with confidence in the first place, but when a brand doesn’t want to mention it I have even less confidence in it. So here we go, buckle in as we get to know the unclaimed bastard son of Jim Beam in the Beam’s Eight Star review.

Beam’s Eight Star Info

Region: Kentucky, USA

Distiller: Jim Beam
Mashbill: 75% Neutral Grain Spirits & 25% Straight Whiskey
Cask: New and used casks
Age: NAS
ABV: 45%

Price: $3 (200ML)

Beam’s Eight Star Review

EYE
Orangish Copper

NOSE
Grits before cooking, sourness, boiled peanuts, rubbing alcohol and a new sponge. This is not a delicate dainty thing; it’s an ugly beast.

PALATE
Everclear mixed with 7-UP, dried corn, dried wood and an overall essence of rubbing alcohol. It tastes like rubbing alcohol smells, the aroma has permeated all of my senses.

FINISH
Short dry burst of toothpicks, everclear, dried corn and 7-UP.

BALANCE, BODY & FEEL
No balance, thin body and a watery feel.

OVERALL
Complex, interesting, nuanced, delicate and tasty. These are not words that could ever be associated with Beam’s Eight Star Blended Kentucky Whiskey. This whiskey is all manner of weird, but not in a good way; it smells and tastes like Old Crow mixed with Everclear and 7-UP that’s been wring from a sponge.

When Bukowski wrote about buying or stealing cheap whiskey Beam’s Eight Star, and it’s related blended American ilk, is what I think of. He’ll name Old Grand-Dad, Old Crow and others, but when he’s talking about the cheap stuff, whose only purpose is to get you messed up, he calls it “cheap whiskey” (which it is). The alcoholic poet mixed the cheap stuff 50/50 with water to make it more drinkable and it’s easy to see why.

The “overall” section of my handwritten notes just reads “Oh no… no… just no.” So kids, just say no to the Beam’s Eight Star. Unless you’re mixing it with Coke. It might work in that… or it might ruin your Coke… it’s likely to ruin your Coke. Cheers?

SCORE: 25/100 (F)

Beam’s Eight Star Label

Josh Peters
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Josh Peters

I read about, think about, write about, and drink whisk(e)y. In short, it's my passion.
Josh Peters
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11 Responses to Beam’s Eight Star Review

  1. I’ll see your Beam’s 8 Star and raise you w/Wiser’s 18 y.o. Seriously, it’s what I imagine turpentine would taste like.

  2. Drinking it so we don’t have to! Thanks, Josh!
    I love this review. Hilarious! Why do we [we, in general] taste something gross and then offer it, “hey! You have to taste this! It’s so gross!” I’m not going to waste my $3, but… nope I’m not. haha

  3. ” And a new sponge ” .. lol !!!!!!!!! I smoke a pipe and something like this brand would be ok to dip my pipe cleaners in to clean the pipe . A whooping 25 points … think I’ll run from this one . Enjoyed your review !

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